Redneck Jokes

Enjoy these great Redneck Jokes!

You might be a redneck if…

Fewer than half of your cars run.

You’ve ever shot a deer from inside your house.

You go to the family reunion to pick up women.

You’ve ever hit a deer with your car…deliberately.

You think a night of fine dining is going to the Snack Bar at Wal-Mart while the automotive department is raising your truck another 8 inches.

The flood history of the area can be seen on your living room walls.

Your Christmas tree is still up in February.

You can’t get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.

You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

You burn your front yard rather than mow it.

You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.

You think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

You have lost at least one tooth opening a beer bottle.

There is a gun rack on your bicycle.

You’ve ever stood outside a K-mart for more than an hour arguing with the manager about the shirt and shoes law.

Your grandma has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her foul language.

You’ve ever barbecued Spam on the grill.

Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

More you might be a redneck jokes ahead!

You consider a three piece suit to be: a pair of overalls, a plaid flannel shirt and thermal underwear.

Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.

Your car has never had a full tank of gas.

Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes and a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.

You own a homemade fur coat.

There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.

Your home has more miles on it than your car.

There is a wasp nest in your living room.

Your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mudflaps.

You’ve ever been too drunk to fish.

You use the term `over yonder’ more than once a month.

You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior.

Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

Your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

The antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.

You think you are an entrepreneur because of the “Dirt for Sale” sign in the front yard.

You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

When you hear someone talking about the king you don’t know whether they’re talking about Elvis or Richard Petty.

You’ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

Your mama has “shotgun ammo” on her Christmas list.

None of your shirts cover your stomach.

You’ve ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister’s honor.

You consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

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